Making Lucknow A World Class City!

A pull-out with the national English daily 'Hindustan Times', today, talks about various features of Lucknow as a modern and 21st century city. It feels good to read some stalwarts writing for the special pages and talking about the city we all feel so proud of!

But, honestly, have we left the city worth being proud of?
Increasing cases of eve-teasing, harassment of common citizens in public offices, cacophony of shrill and indiscriminate honking, blazing and blinding lights lights of vehicles, unruly traffic and irrational overtaking, misbehaving police, pain-stained office walls, overflowing dustbins (even at the posh most market areas, such as Hazratganj), pile of rubbish in every corner, and the rest!
If all this was not enough, even the culture of 'pehle aap' ('after you') is fast turning into 'me first'.
Haven't we turned the city into a mini uncultured and uncouth Delhi where people are judged by the labels they wear or the car they get out from, and where people have no qualms in pushing others in order to make their way!
The newspapers daily report of some incident in the city which shames all of us - be it an MLA's son snatching an advocates car, or a pervert taking pictures of girls travelling in autos!
And we all blame either the government or someone else for the falling values and the chaos around us.
In fact, the city has been hijacked by a bunch of bureaucrats and politicians - originally the public servants and the people's representatives - who display no respect for the common citizens.
The most deafening sound of horns comes from the cars which have blue or red beacon on top of them. The glaring light at night is from an official car of a bureaucrat or a politician, which blinds the ordinary citizen driving his humble small car. The only vehicles which one can spot parked with pride at the 'no parking' areas are those of either government officers or of politicians. All those vehicles which refuse to follow the traffic rules are, not surprisingly, the official cars.
Its high time we Lucknow residents need to stop and introspect - where and what went wrong and which are the possible ways we can improve the city and bring it back to its past glory - it may require educating the bureaucrats and politicians or taming their drivers.
This is not all, the authorities as well as the public needs to start respecting the tourism destinations in the city and all across the state. while authorities can ensure better and proper publicity of so many beautiful getaways, Uttar Pradesh has to offer, the public should learn to keep our state and city clean.
Also, the authorities have to learn now that rules are for everyone - irrespective of the allegiance of a person who flouts them.

The day we curtail the culture of accepting bribe from autos and letting them stop anywhere, or charging daily fee from the small kiosks and letting them encroach the footpath, or allotting the contract for parking (to powerful man linked to politicians) at pavements or places where there should not be any parking, or letting the bigger and  mightier get away when they break rules (the list is exhaustive), we will be taking the first step to bring Lucknow and Uttar Pradesh on a world map.
And it requires efforts from each one of us!  

 
            
    

The Condom Culture!

As many would have feared, the Narendra Modi-led Bhartiya Janata Party (BJP) government in India has started its moral policing. The Union Health Minister Mr Harsh Vardhan has asked the National AIDS Control Organisation (NACO) to slow down on promotion of condoms but push culture instead to curtail the infection from spreading.

The diktat is matter of concern! Two issues relating to the order should be paid attention to.

One: As the NACO too has understood and clarified that commercial sex workers (CSW) and men having sex with men (MSM) cannot be taken under the purview of the order as "morals won't catch their attention" - which means by promoting cultural values, we are conveying a message that it is an immoral and illegal act when CSWs indulge in sex with their clients or when MSMs follow their sexual preference.

The other aspect of this point is that sex is a totally personal issue. Just like a person cannot be compelled to like a certain food or follow any particular religion as both are personal choices of a man or woman, similarly sex is a personal choice and an adult man or woman should be free to decide his or her preference for a partner.

The cultural values what parents pass on to their children decide if that child on growing up will have multiple partners or have sex with other than his or her own partner. Preaching a grown up man or woman with this moral will hardly make a difference. So, what is required at the moment is to inculcate high morals in our children, rather than taming the adults.  
       
Two: Second part of the issue is the existing pattern of advertising for condoms. Most of the advertisements on television these days present condom as a mean to enhance the sexual pleasures. Nowhere the advertisement mentions that it protects the couple from catching HIV infection or any reproductive tract infection or sexually transmitted infection (RTI/STI).

These advertisements do not speak about family planning, either. A country with an overflowing population - where no development can be felt due to number of people or where the roads are bursting to the seams due to ever-increasing users, isn't it necessary to promote the use of condom to check the growth of population or for spacing in children to ensure better for the mother?

Whilst doing case studies on HIV/AIDS, I have met many men, especially truckers or migrating population, whose testimonies emphasised on the importance of condom for checking the spread of HIV/AIDS and RTI/STI, and also curbing the unwanted pregnancies.

It would have been a laudable initiative had the Union Health Minister asked the advertisers to change their style and focus more on health and population with the use of condom than on adding to carnal pleasures!
     

Single Mother - An Invisible Parent

At last, there is at least one government agency that has recognised the mother as a parent of her children. Also, the agency has shown some sensitivity to single mothers, who may be unwed, divorced, widowed or separated.

It elated me to the hilt when I read a news story in today's newspaper, according to which the University Grants Commission (UGC) - a statutory body set up by the Indian government in 1956 to coordinate, regulate and maintain the standards of university education - has asked varsities and affiliated degree colleges to include 'mother's name' in all the testimonials of students - ranging from application forms to degrees and certificates.

As a single parent of my children for last twenty years, I never got this honour of being recognised as their parent. Despite the fact that I was bringing up my two children all alone, fending for them while working 10-12 hours a day, I was always devoid of this honour.

The honour went to the father who was not even aware of his children's whereabouts.

From junior schools to their colleges, every time I was filling up a form, I was forced to write the name of my children's father even though his contribution in parenting was nil. He was neither physically nor financially present in our lives.      

Many a times I raised my voice against this bias - I tried to explain that he is no more with us and it is me who is bringing up my children - physically, financially, emotionally, mentally and in all other possible ways.
Yet, I failed to convince the male chauvinists sitting behind the counters that I also can be the parent of my children, and my role can also extend and go beyond giving them birth. No one was ready to officially acknowledge the active role of a mother in parenting.

And he, who had no presence in his children's lives, his name continued to mock and stare at us from all documents. The children grew up with their father's name as their parent, who was permanently absent from their lives. I remained an invisible parent.

Gradually, as they grew they applied for passports and driving licences, and the same pattern continued - "Father's name".

I kept slogging and sacrificing and he carried on having the honour of being the parent of my children.

Now was the time when children also resented writing their father's name. The realisation was strong that there was no father but the mother was playing father and mother both. They also started arguing - "it is my mother who has brought us up and looks after us then why should we write the father's name"? However, their argument, obviously, fell on deaf ears.

Now, UGC has finally realised the embarrassment and frustration the single mothers like me must have gone through in their lives. Though the decision is late and too little as the same recognition is required at all the places, everywhere, in every form we fill up.